I've been mulling this over in my mind, meditating on the goodness of God. Everywhere I turn I see blessings upon blessings. Rich blessings. Abundant blessings. Pressed down and shaken together blessings. Jesus said that He came that I might have life and have it abundantly. I know it! I see it all around me and feel it in my hands and in my heart.
How could this happen? I don't deserve it. The Lord knows that I am a weak and forgetful creature, who fails daily in the simplest of tasks and disciplines. It is most certainly not because I am deserving of His provision and blessing. I know - and I hope it seeps down so far I never forget it and that I recall it always to mind - that Christ Jesus died for me for my trespasses. That I am not only washed clean, but also clothed in fresh, lovely garments. He came to give me life and life abundantly. (John 10:10)
Yes, I stay at home with my beautiful, healthy, robust, adorable, bright little boy and am a keeper-of-home and wife for my God-fearing, strong, handsome, virile, wonderful Husband, who cherishes, loves, serves, and leads me. My home is cheerful and cozy and pretty. The land around me is a constant source of delight, changing ever-so-slightly day to day as the seasons pass. The air here is clean and invigorating. There is an earthy hope and promise of bettering the land - a joy in the stewardship thereof. I have so many projects that I can use my hands to accomplish, and that, too, is a delight to me. The Lord has even brought opportunities for sewing commissions - fairly well dropping them in my lap! - which has itself been an answer to a long prayer. My husband is flourishing at work and relishing his new role as father. My mother is cancer-free. My dear cousin knows my Redeemer. I am blessed, indeed.
How silly, I am, though. I keep looking over my shoulder, thinking to see a shadow, expecting some sort of dark mallet to come driving from the sky and shatter all this peace and blessing. I was sharing this with my father, and he, as calmly as he could, smacked this misconception right out of the air. I do not serve a God who holds a balance in His hand, pouring out just enough blessing til, "Oh, it's time to weight it back to hard times and trials." NO. My God gives me good things and works all things for good for me, because I trust Him. It may be that difficulty may come, but God is near and will not forsake me. And if I remember aright (and I know I do, it will take more than the span of a few years to wipe it from my memory) He seems even closer in times of trial.
There were locust years before this. I can appreciate the blessings I see because I know what it was to live in lack, aching and crushed, slowly learning the painful lessons that God had for me there. But do you know what? He said that He will restore to me the years that the locust has eaten. (Joel 2:25)
The LORD your God will make you abundantly prosperous in all the work of your hand, in the fruit of your womb and in the fruit of your cattle and in the fruit of your ground. For the LORD will again take delight in prospering you, as he took delight in your fathers, when you obey the voice of the LORD your God, to keep His commandments and His statutes that are written in this Book of the Law, when you turn to the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul. (Deut. 30:9-10)
The Lord takes delight in prospering me. As I turn my face to Him, lean upon His wisdom, and know Him more, He blesses the work of my hands, the fruits of my womb, livelihood, and land. And all this because He loved me before there was time.
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